Monday, July 16, 2007

Happy Birthday B?!?!

About a week ago was my husbands' birthday.... and a big one too. B turned 30!

This is the cake I made...

And a few friends we had over to celebrate...

We also had a babysitter for only the second time, and we went out to dinner the next night. It was wonderful and actually really romantic. I got dressed up and we did valet parking... so nice. We went to one of Michel Rostang's (famous French chef) smaller restaurants, where they test out recipes before they use them in their two and three-star restaurants. It was so good.

So we did have one kinda "upsetting" part to the day, hence the ?!?! in the title. A few months ago, B's brother had a birthday, and I admit that we didn't call him. We mentioned his birthday a few times to each other that day, but every time B was about to call him, something came up or he decided to something else first... so it just never happened. It wasn't that we were living overseas or forgot, because we did send a card. B felt bad and told me so- but even worse, got a lot of criticism from his family for not calling. Well, this really upset me at the time, because we always send cards for both of his brothers' birthdays and almost always remember to call. One is married with kids and we also send his wife a birthday card and send his kids cards and a present.
On our end, we usually only get cards from his parents, but I can't say that for sure. I know I've never gotten cards from his brothers, but he has some years. We usually make phone calls too, and I can honestly say that I don't remember getting calls from them for all of B's birthdays and certainly never for mine.
So, this year his parents call to wish him a happy birthday. Then they ask him to call his younger brother, so his brother can wish him a happy birthday. As you can imagine, I was floored. B not only calls his brothers for most of their birthdays, but now he has to call them on his too? And the older brother didn't call, but he did send an email card. We didn't mention him not calling because we don't want to start playing this game or "keeping score" with family. I know that not everyone has international calling, but you can get a phone card. It's actually twice as expensive to call from France to the US (for us) as it is the other way around, on average. We pay almost 11 - 12 cents a minute (depending on the exchange rate) and a girlfriend of mine who got a cheap phone card at Wal.mart said that the cost was averaging out around 5.5 cents a minute when she called me.
How do you deal with this? Any advice on what I should do? I try to hold my tongue and just cheer him up when these things happen and make him feel bad, but at some point I start getting mad. B mustered up enough "mean" (even though there isn't a mean bone in his body) to say to his brother, "you know this doesn't count as a birthday call, because I had to call you." Good for him, but of course, he laughs and jokes, because he would never want anyone to feel bad on his account.
I wish that there were more people in the world like him.

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